i keep wishing for the same

(02/01/21, ??:?? WIB)

New journal, new year, same resolutions.

♡ Be more open to new opportunities, as scary as they seem.

♡ Connect with more people. Or at least be friendlier, IDK.

♡ Keep in touch with people. People you already know, as well as those you'll meet along the way.

---

The Ila I know today is not the Ila who I met years ago. She has improved in some areas; more understanding, patient, cooperative, and, overall, respectful towards people—friends and... non-friends.

But Ila from the past was more creative and driven. She had dreams. She was inspired. She would have ideas and make them come true. She would really take her time to brainstorm. Nothing was rushed. Past Ila, as I remember, was someone super sentimental too. She used to make homemade, DIY crafts for her friends (and family). Although she knew some wouldn't appreciate them as much as she'd expected, and perhaps all the compassion and effort and time poured into them weren't worth it. But she did it anyway.

She is full of love and wanted the whole world to know.

Lately, I've been missing Past Ila. Creative Ila. Loving Ila. Creator of Two Mixtapes for a Guy Who Wouldn't Text Her Back Ila. Silly Ila.

In 2021, I hope we'd see more of her. I hope I'd see more of her. Maybe others won't even notice the difference, but Current Ila desperately needs her presence.

To the only person I'd need this year 🥂

— S.N.